There is no question that relationships change with time. The more time a couple spends together, the more they start to take each other for granted if they're not proactive in maintaining their relationship. The majority of couples who stay together rate their relationships as "unsatisfactory" or "unhappy." Some people look at this statistic and say, "There's something wrong with commitment and long-term relationships!" However, what is needed is a deeper understanding of the complexity and unconscious strivings present when two people fall in love.
This workshop presents a very positive view of marriage and all intimate, committed relationships, but one that is not well understood by couples and many therapists. Participants will see that the source of conflict is closely related to the unconscious aspects of the attraction to "this particular person" and that the love connection that follows and ultimately results in conflict also contains the potential for significant growth, passion, love and healing.
The skilled couple's therapist must be a good educator, motivator and trainer. Participants will gain skills and tools to motivate couples to actively participate in understanding their frustrations and in developing relationship skills. Walk away with the knowledge to guide couples in a step-by-step manner to learn what the sources of their struggles are and how to separate these sources from the everyday triggers with kindness and empathy.
· Definition of couples
o heterosexual/homosexual
married/living together
remarried/stepfamilies
cross-cultural/mixed religions
UNDERSTANDING THE SOURCES OF CONFLICT
· Learn the six most common things couples fight about
· The importance of understanding the source
o Lincoln memorial story
o Blowing away the smoke or putting out the fire
Dealing with the source(s)
discovery
collaboration
taking responsibility
the importance of slow growth
BRAIN PHYSIOLOGY AND EMOTIONAL REACTIVITY
· The primitive brain and “time”
· The primitive brain and Mr. Magoo
fuzzy perceptions and emotionally confusing partner with a parent
· Cuts and scabs wounds and protections
emotional hurts and defensiveness as a preemptive measure
emotional hurts as a survival issue
ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE
Creating safety
The four critical moments in each day
The language of love
UNDERSTANDING STAGES IN RELATIONSHIPS
The enchantment stage
I love you not because of who you are but for who I am when I’m with you! (when love really is blind)
· The power struggle
The two become one— – “and I get to be the One”
The crossroads
divorce
parallel marriage
the journey of work, growth, and love
HELPING COUPLES UNDERSTAND, ANALYSE AND THEN CREATE AN ACTION PLAN FOR GROWTH AND HEALING
· The Revised Restructuring Frustrations Interview
o filling out the form
o separating the past from the present
o “You have not because you ask not?”
o the most commonly left out part of a marital argument
o becoming realistic
developing empathy
taking responsibility
correcting distortions
developing self-care
· Case histories looking at the content and the source of marital conflicts
· The sharing process increasing safety so you can take risks
COUPLES AND COMMUNICATION
· Pre-marital communication
· The Conscious Dialog Process
The message sent is rarely the message received
How can you feel those emotions? I don’t when you do it to me!
I don’t agree with anything you said!
When communication and therapy don’t work
This course has been approved by , as a NAADAC Approved Education Provider, for 6 continuing education hour(s). NAADAC Provider #77600, is responsible for all aspects of their programming. Content includes elements of one of the NAADAC 8 Counselor Skills Group. Full attendance is required to receive credit, variable credit for partial attendance may not be awarded based on the NAADAC guidelines.
The State of California, Board of Behavioral Sciences will recognize and accept continuing education programs that are sponsored by providers approved by the American Psychological Association and the ASWB. Full attendance at this course will qualify for 6.0 hours of continuing education credit.
is an approved provider with the Florida Board of Clinical Social Work, Marriage and Family Therapy and Mental Health Counseling Provider #50-466. This program is approved for 6 continuing education credit(s).
is a registered counselor continuing education sponsor approved through the State of Illinois Department of Professional Regulation (license # 197-000144). This program is offered for six (6.0) contact hour(s) of continuing education for counselors. Licensed counselors in other states should contact their individual state jurisdiction to review the current continuing education requirements for licensure renewal.
This educational offering consists of 6.0 clock hour(s) of continuing education instruction. Credit requirements and approvals vary per state board regulations. Please save the course outline, the certificate of completion you receive from this offering and contact your state board or organization to determine specific filing requirements.
Vyne Education, LLC., is recognized by the New York State Education Department’s State Board for Mental Health Practitioners as an approved provider of continuing education for licensed mental health counselors #MHC-0027. This educational offering is acceptable for 6.0 continuing education hour(s). Full attendance is required to receive credit for Mental Health Counselors; variable credit for partial attendance may not be awarded based on the State Board guidelines.
is approved through the State of Ohio Counselor, Social Worker and Marriage and Family Therapist Board (provider #RCT091001). This program is offered for six (6) clock hour(s) of continuing education for counselors only. Licensed counselors in other states should contact their individual state jurisdiction to review the current continuing education requirements for licensure renewal.
is an approved sponsor with the South Carolina Board of Examiners for LPC, AC and MFTs (Provider #104). This program is offered for 6 continuing education hour(s).
is an approved sponsor of continuing education for licensed professional counselors through the Texas State Board of Examiners of Professional Counselors (Provider number 2709). This course is offered for 6.0 clock hour(s).
The State of California, Board of Behavioral Sciences will recognize and accept continuing education programs that are sponsored by providers approved by the American Psychological Association and the ASWB. Full attendance at this course will qualify for 6.0 hours of continuing education credit.
This educational offering consists of 6.0 clock hour(s) of continuing education instruction. Credit requirements and approvals vary per state board regulations. Please save the course outline, the certificate of completion you receive from this offering and contact your state board or organization to determine specific filing requirements.
is an approved provider with the Florida Board of Clinical Social Work, Marriage and Family Therapy and Mental Health Counseling Provider #50-466. This program is approved for 6 continuing education credit(s).
is a registered marriage and family therapist continuing education sponsor approved through the State of Illinois Department of Professional Regulation (license # 168-000172). This program is offered for six (6.0) contact hour(s) of continuing education for marriage and family therapist. Licensed marriage and family therapist in other states should contact their individual state jurisdiction to review the current continuing education requirements for licensure renewal.
Vyne Education, LLC., is recognized by the New York State Education Department’s State Board for Mental Health Practitioners as an approved provider of continuing education for licensed marriage and family therapists #MFT-0020. This educational offering is acceptable for 6.0 continuing education hour(s). Full attendance is required to receive credit for Marriage and Family Therapists; variable credit for partial attendance may not be awarded based on the State Board guidelines.
is approved through the State of Ohio Counselor, Social Worker and Marriage and Family Therapist Board (provider #RCT091001). This program is offered for six (6) clock hour(s) of continuing education for counselors and marriage family therapists. Licensed counselors and marriage and family therapists in other states should contact their individual state jurisdiction to review the current continuing education requirements for licensure renewal.
is an approved sponsor with the South Carolina Board of Examiners for LPC, AC and MFTs (Provider #104). This program is offered for 6 continuing education hour(s).
is an approved sponsor of continuing education for licensed marriage and family therapists through the Texas State Board of Examiners of Marriage and Family Therapists (Provider number 195). This course is offered for 6 clock hour(s).
This educational offering qualifies for 6 continuing education hour(s) as required by many national, state and local licensing boards and professional organizations. Save your course outline and certificate of completion, and contact your own board or organization for specific filing requirements.
is approved by the American Psychological Association to sponsor continuing education for psychologists. maintains responsibility for this program and its content. This program offers 6 CE credit(s) for psychologists. Full attendance is required to receive credit for psychologist, variable credit for partial attendance may not be awarded based on the APA guidelines.
is approved as a provider for social work continuing education by the Association of Social Work Boards (ASWB), through the Approved Continuing Education (ACE) program (an approved provider since 1999, approved period 1/27/2018-1/27/2021). maintains responsibility for the program. Social workers will receive 6 Clinical Social Work continuing education clock hour(s) for participating in this course. Licensed social workers should contact their individual state jurisdiction to review the current continuing education requirements for licensure renewal. Visit ASWB's website at www.aswb.org for more information. This educational offering is at the Beginning level for social workers.
The State of California, Board of Behavioral Sciences will recognize and accept continuing education programs that are sponsored by providers approved by the American Psychological Association and the ASWB. Full attendance at this course will qualify for 6.0 hours of continuing education credit.
is an approved provider with the Florida Board of Clinical Social Work, Marriage and Family Therapy and Mental Health Counseling Provider #50-466. This program is approved for 6 continuing education credit(s).
, SW CPE is recognized by the New York State Education Department’s State Board for Social Work as an approved provider of continuing education for licensed Social Workers #0043. This educational offering is acceptable for 6 continuing education hour(s). Full attendance is required to receive credit for Social Workers; variable credit for partial attendance may not be awarded based on the State Board guidelines.
| File type | File name | Number of pages | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Handouts (2 MB) | Available after Purchase | ||
| Presentation (3.1 MB) | Available after Purchase |
GARY BRAINERD, PhD, LMFT, is a licensed Clinical Psychologist and licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California. He works primarily in private practice in Southern California, with offices in Pasadena and Encino. Dr. Brainerd is one of the few psychologists who has specialized in working with couples. Eighty to ninety percent of his practice is with couples. Dr. Brainerd received his doctorate degree in clinical psychology from the Fuller Graduate School of Psychology in 1976. He also has a Master of Arts in clinical psychology from Pepperdine University. Dr. Brainerd is a certified Imago Relationship Therapist and workshop presenter for the Institute of Imago Relationship Therapy and is also a CEU provider in California. He frequently presents one and two-day workshops for couples and therapists including the nationally known, "Getting the Love You Want" workshop. He is the founder and administrator of the Couple's Workstation, a web membership area for couples and therapists who work with couples. He is also the founder of the Couple's Garden, a "smart date night" program for couples. Dr. Brainerd is a member of the American Psychological Association, the California Psychological Association and the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. He served with distinction on the national Board of the Association for Imago Relationship Therapists and wrote Basic Marriage Communication Training: A Program Text as well as Instructor's Manual. Contact information can be found on his website www.relationship-help.com.
Marriage and Family Therapists, Psychologists, Psychiatrists, Psychiatric Nurse Practitioners, Mental Health Nurses, Professional Counselors, Social Workers, Clergy, Pastoral Counselors, Case Managers, Substance Abuse Counselors
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